I was scrolling through the different profiles simply out of curiosity when I came across hers. I was enthralled by her dreams and the way she wanted to go through life. It was like reading a mirror for my thoughts. I wanted to the guy to do all of those things with her. I had never had any desire to go skinny dipping, let alone in someone else’s pool and suddenly my desire to do that outranked anything I had wanted to do. I think what attracted me most to her was that she didn't have a need to go see the world. She wanted to experience and enjoy the life that already surrounded her. She didn't want to just escape; she wanted make it so she enjoyed her life so much she didn't have to escape it.
My wife and I had lost the excitement and adventure in our life; we could both feel our marriage fizzling out, but I never thought of cheating on her or being unfaithful in anyway. I told myself that scrolling through the different profiles was harmless. I never thought that I would actually find a woman that I would want to get to know. It was the first time in my marriage that I thought that my wife might not be “the one”. The guilt only started to set in when I sent her a message: “Hi, my name is Martin”, I had planned to use my real name, but knowing the outcome now I am glad that I didn't, “I read your profile and was immediately intrigued. I’m scared to say that I want all the things you want because that sounds so cliché, but I will say that I want that life. I want to be the one to come home to you and ask you about your day and want with everything in me to know the answer, I want to see that smile on your face when I hand you flowers on a random Tuesday and then take you out for burgers and cokes and enjoy your company as well as my meal. I want to go for Sunday afternoon drives with you where we have no destination and take in the adventures that come along the way. And I want more than anything in the world to go skinny dipping with you at midnight in the neighbours pool! I want that full life and I certainly don’t want it alone.”
We started to email each other and that was when I started to feel like I was cheating on my wife. Part of me wanted to tell her the whole thing, but another part of me knew that her emails were the best part of my day. I had no idea what she looked like; she described herself to me, but I her humble, “5,6 and bruenette”, description was less than detailed. I wanted to meet her in person, but I knew that when I met her I would fall head-over-heels and then it would be real. I am not a cheater, that wasn't the kind of person that I was, but when she asked to meet me I couldn't help myself.
On the day I was to meet her I was so nervous. It was the same nerves that I felt on my wedding day: scared, terrified, ecstatic, and excited all at the same time. I made a point to meet with her at a café on the other side of town to guarantee we wouldn't run into my wife, it was on the other side of town for her too, but she didn't seem to mind. She told me to look for the girl in a red sundress. Thinking about that dress really made me smile. As I got closer to the café I began getting extremely nervous to the point of sickness. I parked the car and just sat there for a while. I started to walk towards the café and my conscience got the best of me, I couldn't cheat on my wife. I stood in front of the café and was about to turn around when I saw the red sundress. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, she almost looked as beautiful as she did on our wedding day. My wife and I made eye contact. I knew from the dress, but it took her a few seconds to realize I was the guy she had been e-mailing. In that moment I had never been so in love with my wife. I stood outside that café and smiled at her, she sat there in gave me that smile that I had shamefully forgotten. That night we skinny dipped in our neighbour’s pool!
